I thank God for his patience and leading in my life.
Sometime you have to take a step out and trust the Lord to lead you and redirect you if need be.
I have been going back and forth between wanting to keep pursuing/starting YL here in Jessamine County or do something else. As of late that something else has been going back to school part-time and getting a Masters Degree while Brian finishes school since the first 2/3rd if the degree that I could finish would be free while I work at ATS.
Wednesday in the 3min drive home I decided I didn't want to take classes. I wanted to do YL.
I have always know that this is what I really wanted to do. There a few things that are not from God that were keeping me from really moving forward with YL.
-Societal Views: If you can further your education for free you would be crazy to pass it up.
-It is going to be hard
Reasons that kept me wanting to do YL even though it would be a start up and it would be hard and long process:
-I love and miss Young Life
-I want to do ministry now.
-I want to build relationships.
-I want to tell the good news of Jesus to High School Students.
-I want to be a part of a community that serves and gives sacrificially of their time, talents and lives.
-I want more than the 8-5 job and church on Sundays.
I think most people who hear will think I am crazy for not going back to school while the very few who know my heart and where I have come from will understand. These are the same rational smart woman in my life that when I decided to go back to class and just give up on YL because it would be hard/ no one was really in support of it at this time, spoke truth into me that made me second guess myself. Truth that reminded me of the tears that fell two and a half months ago when I wept because I didn't want to not do YL for another 4 years.
I believe God has called me to ministry and he has blessed me with the experience and training (and some amazing people who I can ask for wisdom from).
So succeed or fail. I choose to seek God in what he is doing right now. Who knows how God wants to use my willing heart or the people that I will encounter during this time. I am excited about the conversations that I will be able to have and the relationships that will come from them.
Do what makes you feel alive! That is how you know your doing what God would have for you.
Thursday, October 18, 2012
Friday, October 5, 2012
Fall is here!
I am glad that it is Fall. I am not so excited to see 36degrees for a low though :) Today my CO friends woke up to the first snow. That was always the best. Really any time it snowed and went away shortly after I was a happy camper. I am hoping we don't get too much snow here or freezing rain. It will be an adventure to see what the weather is like in Wilmore. Pictures with the leaves will be a must and I promise to share them :)
We were asked to help lead and coordinate the Young Adult activities at the church that we are a part of. It is exciting and I am sure it will be a lot of fun.I am hoping that I can discern more about where God wants me. I have been so stubborn when it comes to this and saying no to everything that comes up just because it wasn't what I had planned. What I planned? Yes I do hear how ridiculous this sounds. So here is trusting the Lord with this and waiting to see where he wants Brian and I to be his hands and feet and join him in the ministry that he is already doing.
Nothing more to report on the YL front. Nothing is really starting up or moving forward. I am trying to decide if I want to start a masters program for free at the seminary (which I could get about 2/3rds of the way through by the time Brian gets done if I go part time). I love to learn and was excited about maybe taking classes when we came but I am just not sure how much extra stress it would be to add 6 credit hours to working 40hours plus babysitting. I think that if I didn't decide to do it I would be deciding out of fear of failing or giving up if I were to start. You can never be sure of something until you try, right?
Brian and I are still really hoping to find people that we connect with. And really new best friends in this new stage in life - people we can do life with. It is funny, but Brian would tell me just because you have Lynda as your best friend doesn't mean you can't find more. I am very aware of that. I am also aware of the fact that it takes a million times longer to find those kinds of relationships when you do not live with other people and are not going to class. Some friendships, even though we are far (like the 6 pack or Lynda, Beth and Makenzie from Colorado), will always be there because you shared life with them in a way that you have not with others. It took a long time to realize what I had in Texas because my mindset was so closed to what the Lord was doing. There were many amazing woman and friends that poured into my life even if it was different than I imagined it should be. In the 2.5 years that I lived in Texas I changed so much and so much life happened. I had to figure out life on my own after college, life in a new state, my mom passed away, Brian and I worked through so much in our relationship and finally got married :) and there are a handful of poeple that were there through all of that when I needed them.
I find myself complaining about what is wrong, about what I don't have and how much I have to do. God is being so patient with me. I am excited to see what God has planned for our time here in Wilmore. I just pray that I wouldn't miss it. And I so desperately long for relationships that challenge me and call out truth in my life.
So we step out, we have people over for dinner (like tonight), we go to the family retreat with our church, we have a pumpkin carving party at our house, and we host Thanksgiving dinner for whoever is not going home/wont be with family. We say yes to coordinating the Young Adults activities. We say yes instead of the familiar no that seems safer and maybe the thing they are asking isnt quiet what you wanted to be a part of, but it is where God has you now.
Here I lay my picture of what life is supposed to look like in Wilmore KY for the next four years and I choose to be obedient to the only one who can give me "life to the full".
We were asked to help lead and coordinate the Young Adult activities at the church that we are a part of. It is exciting and I am sure it will be a lot of fun.I am hoping that I can discern more about where God wants me. I have been so stubborn when it comes to this and saying no to everything that comes up just because it wasn't what I had planned. What I planned? Yes I do hear how ridiculous this sounds. So here is trusting the Lord with this and waiting to see where he wants Brian and I to be his hands and feet and join him in the ministry that he is already doing.
Nothing more to report on the YL front. Nothing is really starting up or moving forward. I am trying to decide if I want to start a masters program for free at the seminary (which I could get about 2/3rds of the way through by the time Brian gets done if I go part time). I love to learn and was excited about maybe taking classes when we came but I am just not sure how much extra stress it would be to add 6 credit hours to working 40hours plus babysitting. I think that if I didn't decide to do it I would be deciding out of fear of failing or giving up if I were to start. You can never be sure of something until you try, right?
Brian and I are still really hoping to find people that we connect with. And really new best friends in this new stage in life - people we can do life with. It is funny, but Brian would tell me just because you have Lynda as your best friend doesn't mean you can't find more. I am very aware of that. I am also aware of the fact that it takes a million times longer to find those kinds of relationships when you do not live with other people and are not going to class. Some friendships, even though we are far (like the 6 pack or Lynda, Beth and Makenzie from Colorado), will always be there because you shared life with them in a way that you have not with others. It took a long time to realize what I had in Texas because my mindset was so closed to what the Lord was doing. There were many amazing woman and friends that poured into my life even if it was different than I imagined it should be. In the 2.5 years that I lived in Texas I changed so much and so much life happened. I had to figure out life on my own after college, life in a new state, my mom passed away, Brian and I worked through so much in our relationship and finally got married :) and there are a handful of poeple that were there through all of that when I needed them.
I find myself complaining about what is wrong, about what I don't have and how much I have to do. God is being so patient with me. I am excited to see what God has planned for our time here in Wilmore. I just pray that I wouldn't miss it. And I so desperately long for relationships that challenge me and call out truth in my life.
So we step out, we have people over for dinner (like tonight), we go to the family retreat with our church, we have a pumpkin carving party at our house, and we host Thanksgiving dinner for whoever is not going home/wont be with family. We say yes to coordinating the Young Adults activities. We say yes instead of the familiar no that seems safer and maybe the thing they are asking isnt quiet what you wanted to be a part of, but it is where God has you now.
Here I lay my picture of what life is supposed to look like in Wilmore KY for the next four years and I choose to be obedient to the only one who can give me "life to the full".
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